Advice to ignore adultery

It used to be considered shameful for a married woman to commit adultery, destroy two marriages, and walk out on a husband who has forgiven her. But current newspaper advice says otherwise:

Dear Margo: I'm the oldest of three, ... [married] 15 years: My husband and I were struggling in our marriage. There were plenty of issues, but the catalyst was when I had an affair. Finally, my husband decided he wanted to fix our marriage, but by this time I was emotionally done. We divorced, and ... are co-parenting our kids and doing fine. We're each dating someone else. (I am seeing the man I had the affair with, who also divorced).

My brothers stopped talking to me upon learning of my infidelity. Since then, one of them eased up a bit at Christmas, but refused to allow me in his home at Easter. ...

Dear R: Are your bothers [sic] Puritans, or Afghans? You really have done nothing to harm them, and their self-righteousness is deplorable. There is nothing for you to do except be a lady. ... I see no reason for you to wear the scarlet "A" in this day and age, and I think the brothers sound odd. ... — Margo, forwardly

Even this advice was too retro for some newspapers, as they edited out the words "Afghans" and "lady".

These women have attitudes are are increasingly common among 21st century American women. The attitudes are increasingly acceptable, and anyone who objects is called a Puritan or an Afghan. If the writer were really a lady, none of this would have happened. Her brothers probably do not want her attitude to infect their families. Not inviting her over for Easter is a reasonable way to express disapproval. Someone has to say that such behavior is wrong, or women will do it more and more.

In her advice to the other letter writer today, Margo suggests computer spying on a spouse, even if it is illegal. So she condones distrust and illegal spying as well as adultery. Margo is the daughter of the advice-giver who used the pseudonym Ann Landers.